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Thanks again for the continued comments and replies to my edit. This post and the comments are an eye opener. I do feel some of the pressure lifting off me in that I can start doing things for myself. He sees all families being able to stay together. I'm really glad to hear a few of you have stories of happy interfaith relationships, or leaving the church together, so there's always a chance. I have finally realized that the church is fake and I'm so grateful that I got a second chance with this guy.
That I will be expected to be a full time single parent most of the time. I'm surprised this thread is still getting replies. If you want him - he is part of a medical school package right now, and likely will be for some time to come. When we obsess over it we start acting like a customer in a clothing store wondering what he or she will look like if they wear that particular wardrobe. Work on myself, not him. All these are reasons to have some serious discussions. I'm so glad to have found this blog. Additionally we have no family nearby for me to rely on for help or just to combat loneliness. He then proceeded to beat the shit out of her for a decade.